By Lisa Phillips
Sports Editor
FEATURE
Published May 2010
It’s 7:30 a.m. on Monday morning. No sane college student would ever be up at this hour. But I’m crawling out of bed. Yay, 8:30 a.m. court dates.
Two weeks ago, I wrote about being arraigned. My house threw a K party, the cops showed up, and my name was on the noise violation we received. Turns out noise violations are actually misdemeanors in Kalamazoo, so I’ve been contesting the misdemeanor.
Today, I was scheduled for my pretrial conference, which involves meeting with the city prosecutor to see if the case can be resolved. There are 3 options: a plea of guilt is entered, charges are dropped, or the case proceeds to court.
Lesson #1 of pretrial: Arrive early. I strolled into the courtroom punctually; there had been no point in arriving early to the arraignment, we had faced the judge in a random order. Not so with the city prosecutor: she went by order of arrival. I signed my name 14th on a list of about 30. Getting to that 14th spot took almost two hours.
The drill was straightforward: talk to the prosecutor in her office, and then appear in front of the judge. In the downtime between cases, the atmosphere was almost relaxed; the judge rambled on about everything from golf trips to South Park (he explained the concept of “Pulling a Kenny”) from his seat in front.
Awful TV puns aside, I was impressed by the compassion he showed for those entering guilty pleas. People asked for extended payment options for fines and got them. Twice, he waived fines in favor of community service for those who couldn’t pay.
Yet, 10 minutes before I faced the prosecutor, it was quickly evident that these proceedings were not to be taken lightly. A woman had received successive noise violations; the judge had given her 4 months to move from her apartment, and she hadn’t. An heated shouting match ensued, where she argued that she hadn’t had time, and he told her that he didn’t care and was throwing her into jail immediately. She had 5 children at home.
Great. Woman sent to jail for the same misdemeanor I’m contesting. My heart dropped into my stomach. “Phillips?” The city prosecutor, a stout woman radiating authority, called my name. Leaving the ruckus behind, I shuffled to her office.
The prosecutor read my file. “This is your chance to state anything I should hear before considering this case.” I said what probably every college student contesting a misdemeanor says. We didn’t mean to disturb the peace. The party got out of hand. I thought I was being responsible by talking to the cops. Yada, yada. Despite my earnestness, she started writing my sentence before I even finished. She had heard this before. She only spoke once, sharply contradicting me when I said we hadn’t meant to throw a party: “You did mean to throw a party. Be honest.” I quickly corrected myself.
I received a “delayed sentence.” In exchange for pleading guilty, I need to complete 15 hours of community service. If, in 3 months, those hours are completed and I receive no further criminal violations, I return to court on September 1 and the charges are dropped.
Three more months until this whole thing is over. But, no more misdemeanor. I’d have a clean criminal file once again.
I returned to the courtroom and faced the judge. He was amiable, almost fatherly, but I probably looked terrified.
“By entering a plea, you’re not going to have a trial, do you understand that?” Yes.
“You are giving up the rights listed on your rights sheet, do you understand that?” Yes.
I raised my right hand and was sworn in. “What do you plead?” Guilty, your honor.
I walked out of the courtroom after 2.5 hours and was unsurprised to find a bright yellow envelope with a lovely $10 fine on my car windshield. If there’s one part of the judicial system you can always predict, it’s the Kalamazoo Parking Police.
But, what did I learn this time? Always carry a ton of quarters. No, but seriously, Take the law seriously.
The judge was nice on many occasions. But with a flick of the wrist, fates can change. It’s been a ton of hassle for what I thought was a minor infraction. But the same process is necessary for contesting all kinds of petty crimes we may underestimate: speeding, public intoxication, MIPs, DUI’s, disorderly conduct; all of these are misdemeanors. While we might brush off when we see cops arrive at parties, figuring they’ve got more important things to do than hassle college students, in reality, they can give us a ton of pain.
So, know the rules. Know your rights. Know the process. Protect yourself. The law’s not something to trivialize, it’s something to respect.
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